Welcome...

This blog was born to hold the memories of my past. You are welcome to follow me on the journey. I have had a few people tell me that I should sell my story, and have it become a book. It's a thought I am taking very seriously.

In the meantime, for my normal blog Empty Veins - Go here.

So now, a little history:

Where to begin in this attempt to sort out my past? Most would say the expected.. the beginning, right? heh. I'm afraid it won't be that easy - for I don't remember the beginning. So, let's just start with memories.. They'll be random from here on out, but I'll try to put them in order as best as I can.

First, let's do a little background for those joining this journey that does not know much about my family. I grew up mostly with my dad. For a long time we didn't know where my mom was, she came back into my life as I got older - and left it before I can really remember much details of it. I know now that I am older that she left for many valid reasons. I think fear being a big one. I'm happy to say that we are close now, and she is an active part of my life.

So, I was a daddy’s girl…I spent most of my childhood growing up with him. But there were often times that I was sent to live at my grandmothers - who had a foster home, I loved it and hated it all in one. My dad had many moods; he was always up, or down, never in between. Sometimes he'd lock himself in his room for days at a time... And he worked constantly. I learned to take care of myself fairly young, I'd say about 8. I cooked, I cleaned, and I helped my dad pay the bills. I did whatever I could to keep him happy. Whether it was a household task, or trying to track down my mother. I was used to it being just my brother and I. He was my stepping stone, and we got through everything together. All of this is stuff I'm okay with. The nightmares started when my dad adopted my cousin. His mom, my dad’s sister died when he was very young, and later my dad legally adopted him. It’s always been unknown where his father is. Most of the start of my memories will start there, the rest just kind of falls in after. I will add more background as I go, but that’s a start. I am not entirely sure how much will make sense from here on out, but I'll do the best I can. I'm going to take it memory to memory. Don't be afraid to ask me any questions as we go along here, in fear that it'll upset me. It won't.